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Monday, May 24, 2010

The Mallen Patch 

When I was a teenager, there was a period drama on television called “The Mallens” which was adapted from a book called “The Mallen Streak”. All that I remember of this show was that members of the Mallen family all had characteristic black hair with a white streak running up from the forehead. This was the Mallen Streak.

I have a Mallen Patch. It grows in my beard on the left hand side of my face and is an almost exact square with each side about an inch and a half in length. This has troubled me for a while. What should I do with it?

For a time, I tried trimming the top edge down so that I just had the bit along the jaw. I wasn’t keen on that. For one thing it is a terrible job to keep the beard symmetrical and for another if made me look like I was a used-car salesman who’d just escaped from 1978.

So I decided to grow the sides back a couple of weeks ago. The memory of my Mallen Patch had faded and I thought that it couldn’t really be as bad as I thought.

Wrong! It was worse. Amidst the darker hair the white square loomed like a beacon.

I don’t mind going grey. I have a lot of grey and white scattered around my beard as it is. I think though, that having a white square on my cheek looks a bit silly. So for the moment I have a goatee again.

That will remain until I get bored with it, get irritated with shaving, make a mistake with the trimming or forget how bad my Mallen Patch looks.

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